Family Ministry in the End Time.
A Lecture prepared by Rev Dr. A.B. Jayesimi,
President Ogun Baptist Conference
Introduction
The
end of age is fast approaching with visible signs as recorded in the Bible
coming to past. The evil one has changed the strategy of the warfare and thus
decided to attack the smallest unit of the society called family. Family is any group of People related by
blood or marriage especially parents and their Children.
This
attack is expected to have resultant effect on both the church and larger
society. Family is under a great deal of stress and brokenness due to the rising
divorce rate, increased economic pressure on family, and rapid social changes
that tear family apart. The present situation of family has given the church justification
to support family life. This presents both challenges and opportunities for the
church that will remain relevant in the scheme of God for the end time.
The
end time, end of the ages or the last hour as recorded in the Bible mean the
same thing (Matthew 13:39; 1Corinthians 10:11; and Heb 9:26). The end time is
when the activities on earth will come to an end and Jesus Christ will come the
second time which will lead to final judgment. Some of the signs of the end include
lawlessness, coldness in faith, apostasy and so on (Matt 24:12, 2 Tim 3:1-5).
Biblical
Basis for Family Ministry in the Church
There is Biblical justification for family ministry
in the contemporary Church. God started family in the creation account through
Adam and Eve. God created male and female to form the initial family. They were
created in the image of God with the mandate to be fruitful and multiply.(Gen
1:27-28). The Bible also lays emphasis on the parent-child relationship
as well as on that of husband and wife.
The family
is a setting in which faith and values can be transmitted from generation to
generation (Deut 6:4-9). The Biblical families used family setting to
communicate values to generations yet unborn. They taught the basis of their
religious convictions early in life to the members of the family. They put into
practise the teachings and thus became living examples.
The
Biblical foundation for the ministry helped in leading children to Jesus
Christ. This was demonstrated in the lives of Lois and Eunice in helping
Timothy to accept Jesus Christ as Saviour and Lord. Family ministry thus
provide opportunity to teach people of all ages the word of God which lead them
and stabilize them in the Lord.(2 Timothy 3:15).
Important
Characteristics of effective Family Ministry
An
effective and efficient family ministry in the Church setting must have the
following characteristics:
Ø Family
ministry sees people in the context of relationships.
Ø Family
ministry looks at the needs of the family at different stages of development.
It takes into account transitions and recognises the changing needs that
different stages will bring to the concerned both in the Church and society.
Ø Family
ministry strengthens existing relationships and helps people build new ones.
Ø Family
ministry promotes understanding. It helps church members learn acceptance and
love for people in a various stages of life and family settings.
Ø Family
ministry recognises that strong families build strong members for the Kingdom of
God on earth.
Ø Family
ministry promotes reconciliation and healing which is an important message of
God for his people in the last days. It offers healing to those who have been
abused and bruised in abnormal family setting and hurt by lost relationships.
It offers restoration and wholeness to those whose identities have been
shattered and distorted by abuse.
Ø Family
ministry teaches competence in a variety of interpersonal skills and areas of decision-making.
This can include a wide range of topics, from dealing with sexuality to
managing money and so on.
Ø Family
ministry mostly uses three approaches: education, enrichment, and counselling.
It teaches people new interpersonal skills. It offers opportunities for the
enrichment of existing relationships. In addition, it offers opportunity for
personal and relational growth under the guidance of a skilled counsellor.
Ø Family
ministry is a ministry of grace. It draws people to fellowship in God's church. People who are alone and
estranged are invited to experience love and belongingness.
Ø Family
ministry presents what Jesus can do among human beings when we are incorporated
into the body of Christ. This is the ultimate family of God, the place where we
find wholeness and belongingness.
The Scope of Family Ministry in the Church setting
The
focus of Family Ministries is upon relationships. The basic target areas of
emphasis for Family Ministry include: premarital guidance, strengthening
marriage, parent education with attention also given to: extended families,
single parenting, stepfamily needs, family needs of singles.
The
development of relational skills fostered by Family Ministries enriches
relationships both within the home and the church, the household of faith.
Suggested
Topics for Family Ministry in the Church
Biblical
Foundations for Family Ministries
Human
Growth and Development
Understanding
the Family as a System
Spiritual
Parenting
Sexuality
Education
Marriage
Strengthening
Communication
Effective
Family Ministries in the Local Church
Anger
and Conflict Resolution
Using
Family as an Evangelistic Centre
Family
Ministries Programmes and Implementation
Challenges
Facing Contemporary Family
Successful
family ministry must take into account the many pressures tearing families
apart in contemporary society which include:
Economic
Pressure:
The changing face of the economy has had a major impact on Families. The cost
of raising a child has grown so much that families are choosing not to have
children, postponing childbirth, or having fewer children. Economic pressure has
also forced most mothers into the workplace, and thus need to combine career
with child rearing which is putting added stress on many families.
Breakdown
of Community Life: Our society is also experiencing a
breakdown of the natural networks of traditional community life. Many families
are on the move in the search for economic stability. This movement affects the
family, church and society at large. The peer group is increasingly significant
in shaping values of young people. The contemporary media culture has had a
profound impact on families. Identity and values are being formed through mass
media than face-to-face community relationships.
Changing
Gender Roles: Changing gender roles has affected both young
people and adults. The changing concepts of what it means to be a man and a
woman have helped create freedom and new possibilities in both the workplace
and the home, but also confronted people with new pressures and uncertainties. It
is the duty of family ministry to help members strike balance on this sensitive
issue. Men wanted Women to do all domestic works while Women wanted Men to pay
all the bills. There is need to shift ground to equilibrium position for family
stability
Human
Sexuality: Young people are becoming sexually
active at a much earlier age than it used to be due to exposure. There is
increasing pressure to seek sexual pleasure through abnormal ways which
includes homosexuality, incest, rape, bestiality and other inappropriate sexual
behaviours outside of marriage. The media is modelling sexual freedom without
consideration for consequences. There is serious need for sexual purity which
family ministry can teach for appropriate sexual behaviour.
The
High Divorce Rate: The alarming rate at which married
couples are divorcing one another in major Countries of the World has reached
an epidemic level. The high rate of divorce and marriage break-down in
the society and among believers in Christ is also of great concern to Christian
Ministers.
There
are many confusing statistics on the rates of divorce in different parts of the
World. Christian Apologetics and Research Ministry (CARM) claimed that divorce
rate has risen to fifty percent since the seventies in America. Records at the
Customary Court Ikeja, Lagos showed that in 2010, there were 64 applications
for divorce. In 2011, there were 56 applications and in 2012, the court
recorded 43 divorce applications. The court has granted 40 dissolutions while
123 cases were on-going.[1]
The Customary Court, Ojo, Lagos recorded 67 applications filed for divorce in
2010 and 71 applications in 2012. The court granted 62 applications while 30
applications were withdrawn. In all 354 applications were filed for dissolution
of marriages in the two courts for the period of three years. Ninety-three
applications succeeded, 30 were withdrawn, leaving 99 cases as on-going.
Divorce
is becoming almost as common inside the church as outside it. The high divorce rate
and rise in out-of-wedlock births have resulted in a large increase in single
parent families. Remarriage brings families
together in new combination, these step families face unique stresses to the
new siblings, as well as to the husband and wife.
Transformation
of Society through Family Ministry.
It has been established that many families are facing challenges in our
Society. Families are being corrupted and thus need to be transformed from its
decayed situation to become acceptable one to the Living Lord. This transformation
can be achieved through Christian Family. This is important because the
smallest unit of the Society can effectively influence and bring a lasting
solution to the larger society. Since Christian Family supposed to serve as
salt, Light and City set on the hill, it thus becomes sacred responsibilities of
the Church to transform Families.
Salt preserves from decay and thus Christian Family must preserve the
Biblical standard of Family living as ideal for the contemporary society. We
need to do this by inculcating the principles of God in the new Generation
through our Children and thus teach them diligently for proper understanding
for use in life. The successful passage of the Godly teachings will ultimately
transform families and society.
Conclusion
Family ministry is an effective method for preparing the end time army of
God in the contemporary setting. Satan has brought a lot of corruption into the
family life. This has made people to accept inappropriate behaviour as normal
lifestyle. Family ministry helps to lay solid foundation upon which stable
Christian family can be built and nurture for the glory of God and benefit of
the members.
The Christian Family is set on hill and thus placed on the high altitude
for others to see. Since City set on hill cannot be hidden, Christian Family
ought to set the standard for others to follow. Family ministry can help model
standard of excellence in the Lives of Church members. She can encourage members to put to practical
use all the teachings of the Lord on family relationship that the contemporary
society claimed that is not practicable. When the society begins to find the
joy of the Lord and its dividends in Christian Families, they will be encouraged to accept Jesus Christ
teachings as pillars that can sustain healthy family.
References
Clinebell,
Howard Basic Types of Pastoral care and
Counseling Resource for the Ministry of Healing & Growth Nashville: Abingdon
Press, 1989.
Collins, Gary R. Christian Counseling: A comprehensive
Guide Waco: Word Incorporated, 1988
Donovan, O. Wilbur Biblical
Christianity in African Perspectives, Carlisle: Paternoster press. 1995.
Encarta Dictionary electronic edition.
Harper,
A. Robert & Ellis, Albert. A Guide to
Successful Marriage California: Harold Shaw
Publishers, 1976.
Heokema,
A. Antony. Created in God’s Image UK: Eerdmans Publishing , 1986.
Heward-Mills,
Dag, Model Marriage: A Marriage Counselling
Handbook. Accra: Parchment
House, 2005.
Hyder,
O. Quentin.The People You Live with
Old Tappan: Fleming H. Revell Company,
1975
Watterson,
Douglas Reach out for Love Nashville:
Convention Press, 1972
Internet Sources
Ezugwu, Anayo
“Threatened by Rate of Divorce” Realnews April 22,2013 http://realnewsmagazine.com/lifestyle/threatened-by-rate-of-divorece accessed on Saturday August 3, 2013.
Hall, Todd W. “The Personal Functioning of Pastors: A
Review of Empirical Research with implications
for the Care of Pastors.” Journal of Psychology and Theology: 1997. Vol. 25. No2. 240-253. http://cconline.fathsite.com/content.asp?CID=39581 accessed on December 26, 2013.
Implications of Divorce http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Implications_of_divorce accessed on Friday 2nd of August, 2013.
Jackson, Wayne The Devastating Effects of Divorce http://m.christiancourier.com/articles/81-the-devastating-effects-of-divorce.
accessed on July 26, 2013.
Kawachi,
Ichiro Gilman, Stephen E.; Garrett M. Fitzmaurice, and Stephen L. Buka ."Family Disruption in Childhood and Risk of
Adult Depression". American Journal of Psychiatry 160:5, May 2003.
[1]
Anayo Ezugwu, “Threatened by Rate of Divorce” Realnews April 22,2013 http://realnewsmagazine.com/lifestyle/threatened-by-rate-of-divorece
[accessed on Saturday August 3, 2013].
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